Kent Brockman
Years ago

Dumbest Sporting Injury

In honour of Jana Rawlinson not making the Olympics due to her toe, i thought i would pose the question what is the dumbest injury you have done or know of.

My favourites are Paul Rogers doing the dishes, Bradtke making toast and KJ doing his knee in a post game celebration hug with Barkley.

Could also throw in Andy Gaze almost dying from painting his house.

Others?

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Fezlington  
Years ago

Mike Mitchell of the Gold Coast Rollers...putting his hand thru a glass door!

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Melvin Corpuscle  
Years ago

hmm ... tony allen showing off, going for a dunk after the whistle, lands awkwardly and blows out his knee.
NFL player last year, slipped on a macca's bag and put his hand thru his tv ...
Starks - testicle torsion
there's a few more listed at withleather.com (sports forum)

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A Spanish goalkeeper missed the 2002 world cup because he dropped a bottle of cologne on his foot and broke it.

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santiago_Ca%C3%B1izares

"His club form ensured himself as first-choice international in the 2002 FIFA World Cup, but he missed out on the tournament due to an accident with an aftershave bottle which resulted in a severed tendon in his foot. Since then, Casillas has been the first Spain goalkeeping option."

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Melvin Corpuscle  
Years ago

and there was a player in about 1993, who when he fouled out, headbutted the basketball support in frustration - he became a quadraplegic and died of heart failure in 2002 (?)

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Chewy  
Years ago

There was a former Power player (I think it was Stewie Dew) who injured himself and was out for a few weeks because he was sitting in an awkward position for too long while he was playing the Playstation. And no, I'm not a Crows fan, go Power!

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Mantis  
Years ago

Baseballer Sammy Sosa injured his back sneezing. Another slugger, Kevin Mitchell, strained his ribs vomiting. Pitcher Adam Eaton stabbed himself in the stomach (he was using the knife to unwrap a DVD).

Pete Maravich blew out his knee while throwing a full-court outlet pass between his legs.

John Platten retired after injuring his knee celebrating a team-mate's goal. He isn't the only player sidelined by a celebration, baseballer Terry Harper dislocated his shoulder high-fiving a teammate.

Don't forget Greg Oden, who injured his knee on his couch.

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The_Champ33  
Years ago

Michael Voss has cursed himself twice.

Once almost lost a finger gardening or attaching something to a trailer.

Stabbed himself in the calf while working outdoors.

Zab Judah putting his arm through the shower glass due to arguing with his father and scared of being beaten up by Shane Mosley.

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lockstock  
Years ago

A pleyer I coached earlier this year broke his hand after getting his 4th foul in the 3rd quarter by punching the wall when I subbed him off

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Anonymous  
Years ago

About 3 years ago the team I support in UK football Preston North End lost one of their midfielders for 3 weeks after he spilled a hot coffee in his lap & scalded his testicles.

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curtleyambrose  
Years ago

I like the idea of ironic sporting injuries, for instance even as a swans fan i thought it would have been funny if plugger lockett was injured by his own team mates jumping in celebration on him after he kicked the point against essendon in the 96 prelim and therefore as their best player missing the next week.

haven't there been plenty of players injured somehow involving their kids?

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JockeyClub  
Years ago

Does anyone remember the Dermott Brereton story ( not the Grand Final-lung puncture but the supposed bedroom exploits ) ? Not even sure how I can write what supposedly happened without being censored . Depends if you regard this as a "sporting injury" or "an injury to a sportsman" !

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Johnny Sack  
Years ago

I remember Jayson Williams (of the New Jersey Nets/alleged shotgun fancier fame) broke his leg lifting weights at 1am in the morning back in the early 90's (wink, wink...)...

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Mundine and his contact lens was pretty funny

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Courtesy of Basketbawful:

BJ Tyler: According to Wikipedia: "Prior to the 1995-96 NBA season, Tyler was selected by the Toronto Raptors in the 1995 expansion draft. According to journalist Chris Young's book Drive, Tyler accidentally fell asleep with a pack of ice on his knee, severely damaging it and thus losing all the speed for which he was famed, and subsequently had to retire." Yeah, right. He just didn't want to play for the Raptors. Vince Carter feels him on that one.

Charles Barkley: Sir Charles has never been easy on the eyes...not even his own. Chuck missed the Phoenix Suns' 1994-95 season opener because the first layers of his corneas got burned off by body lotion during an Eric Clapton concert. Apparently, allergies and the dazzling stage lights caused him to rub his eyes, and he got lotion in them.

Greg Ostertag: You know we love Greg Ostertag around these parts, and this is one of the reasons why: The big goof fractured the third metacarpal on his right hand in October of 2004 when he tripped on a footstool while getting out of bed. Mind you, this happened after his first day of practice with his new team, the Sacramento Kings.

Phoenix Suns team doctor, Richard Emerson, said: "It was a chemical reaction to a type of lotion that he uses. I wouldn't anticipate it'll reoccur because I don't think he'll use that type again." No kidding.

Note that Barkley was also suffering from a strained lower abdominal wall at the time. Probably from too many hotdogs at the concert.

Corey Maggette: During the 2001-02 season, Maggette got so upset over a call that he slammed his hand on the scorer's table in frustration and dislocated the ring and little fingers on his right hand. Maggette ended up with a cast and a four-week vacation.


Dirk Nowitzki: In December 2001, before a game against the Washington Wizards, The Flying Dutchman sprained a tendon in his ankle when he put his shoe on improperly and the stomped his foot on the floor to make sure it was on right. The injury was so bad he missed the game. He must have been one sour Kraut when that happened. Good thing there weren't any exercise bikes around.

George McCloud: Prior to Game 3 of the 1992 first round playoff series between the Indiana Pacers and the Boston Celtics, McCloud "held his ankle in a funny way" while talking on the phone. This somehow injured the ankle so badly he couldn't play in the game and had to sit on the bench in street clothes as his team got eliminated.

Gilbert Arenas: File this one under "unfortunate pube shaving accidents." Very unfortunate. I'll let Agent Zero tell the tale: "When I was new in the NBA the team veterans convinced me to shave, you know, down there, because they said the hair stinks. I used my girlfriend's razor, which was rusty and gave me keloids. The doctor prescribed medicine to dab on, but I just poured it all over. Three days later I woke up screaming. The skin was burnt off my scrotum, down to my crack, everything -- just raw flesh. I still had to run and play, so I used a numbing spray for a month until it healed. Now I use clippers." I bet he does. [Thanks to The Brazilian Guy for this one.]

John Starks: Oh my God. I've been laughing about this one for about five minutes. Thank you, Sturla, for bringing this joy back into my life. (Although I'm sure Starks would punch me for it.) Back in 2001, Starks suffered -- wait for it...wait for it -- a twisted testicle! No, I am not making this up. The scientific term for this is testicular torsion, and it happens when the spermatic cord that provides the blood supply to a testicle is twisted, cutting off the blood supply, often causing orchalgia (that is, intense pain in the nutsack). Prolonged testicular torsion will result in the death of the testicle and surrounding tissues. Starks had to undergo a procedure to "open up and untwist the testicle." Ouch.

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Kendrick Perkins: Boston's big man missed time last season due to a right big toe that was injured when he dropped a bed on it. "I was asleep. I guess whoever put my bed together didn't put it together right when I moved, so one side of my bed fell. My bed was tilted, so I got out of my bed to go push down on the other side. And when I was about getting ready to push down on the other side, the headboard started coming in. So I tried to push the headboard back so it wouldn't fall over. My foot was under the bed and the other side of the bed fell on my foot." Man, I hate it when that happens.

Kevin Johnson: During the mid-90s, KJ won a regular season game on a buzzer-beating shot and received a crippling bear hug from teammate Charles Barkley. And I mean "crippling" in the literal sense. Chuck squeezed Kevin so hard his shoulder was dislocated. (At least Barkley didn't rub any body lotion in KJ's eyes.) Unlike Dwyane Wade, Kevin didn't have to be carted off teh court in a wheelchair, but he was out of action for the next two weeks. KJ also had hernia surgery in 1996 after years of abdominal problems that were allegedly brought on by picking up teammate Oliver Miller to celebrate a play.

Latrell Sprewell: The man who once choked his coach broke his hand by taking a swing at the boyfriend of a female party guest who threw up on his yacht. But it seems that Spree's punches were roughly as accurate as his jumpers (42 percent lifetime): He whiffed and punched the wall instead. Sprewell tried to cover up the incident, but some of his guests leaked the story and the Knicks fined Spree $250,000 for not reporting the injury. Sprewell, ever the victim, complained about it to the press. "They talk about being a family but they're not sticking with me. The biggest thing to me is that I'm hurt. So don't kick me when I'm down." But...but that's the best time to kick somebody!

Lionel Simmons: The L-Train was an absolutely amazing basketball player. In college. He finished third in all-time NCAA scoring with 3,217 points, trailing only only Pete Maravich and Freeman Williams. He also won both the Naismith College Player of the Year award and the John R. Wooden Award. His NBA career, on the other hand, was barely more than decent. But Lionel's greatest contribution to the pro game was the injury he suffered during the 1990-91 season: He missed two games with wrist tendonitis caused by overtraining on his Nintendo Game Boy. I can only hope he defeated King Koopa and saved the Princess.

Note that, a year later, Derrick McKey missed seven games with the same injury. Uh huh. Mind you, this is the same player for whom I created the term flu-like symptoms, so you'll excuse me if I remain suspicious.

Muggsy Bogues: The tiny, tiny man (who was playing for the Toronto Raptors) missed the second half of a game against the Portland Trailblazers after accidentally sucking in some ointment fumes during a halftime treatment. ("Ointment fumes"...so that's what the kids are calling it these days? I guess I should double-check with Josh Howard.) Said Bogues: "Never happened to me before and I hope it never happens again. That was one of those fluke things you don't even dream about."

Ron Artest: Ron-Ron threw his back out of whack...driving his wife's Mercedes. This is apparently what happens when you stuff an extra-large body into an extra-small space.

Scott Williams: While playing for the Chicago Bulls during the Michael Jordan-less 1993-94 season, Williams had a string of bizarre injuries. First, he missed four days of practice after straining his shoulder at the team's annual bowling outing. A few days later, he hurt his back lifting a TV he bought on sale. Then, later in the season, he injured a tendon behind his right kneecap while stretching, and that was the end of his season. That kind of injury proneness would make even Bill Walton wince.

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But my absolute favourite:

Mo Williams: Mo missed a game against the Pacers last season with pubic symphysitis. (Editor's note: That's an injury to the pubic symphysis, which is a cartilaginous joint above the man region.) I have no idea how you injure this sensitive joint, but surgically cutting it allows more of the penis to hang outside the body, thereby increasing its length. I'm not trying to insinuate that Mo had elective surgery to make his dong longer, but...no, actually, that's kind of what I'm insinuating.

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Quagmire  
Years ago

There is a football team that plays locally in SA- i will not name and shame- but they lost a string of grand finals during the mid 90's....

It sure didn't help their cause when the captain and strong leading forward pulled his ham-string crashing throught the banner at the start of the game....one down before the bounce...

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igotmadskills  
Years ago

Mark bradke in his last season stuffed his back making a cup of coffee...

Brad hodge stuffed his back putting on his pants last year in the 20 20 in perth.

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jimmy de bas  
Years ago

Back in Year 4... my mates and I were playing cricket at lunch time, and I was wicket-keeping. I went to do the old trick where you move the metal stumps forward so that when the batsmen takes his backswing, he hits the stumps.

Unfortunately, my mate decided to go for a hook shot on this occasion, and it wasn't the stumps that he hit, but the side of my head. I was rushed off to the sick bay with blood spewing out of my head and then got to go home for the afternoon.

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